Tongue Tied By a Tuba Accident

Say that ten times in a row

May 15, 2023

Very few people know that I play the tuba. Way back in the dark ages, when I was in high school in 1980mumblemumble, I was the first female sousaphone player in marching band. My love for big things between my legs began then. ;)

Playing the tuba is probably one of the least “feminine” activities one can partake in, from swollen lips and ridged philtrims to spit valves and grooved shoulders when you march on a football field carrying a brass instrument the size of your little brother.

In mid-August in Ohio, where I grew up, band practice meant non-stop sweat, aching shoulders and legs, and a jealous streak a mile wide for those flute and piccolo players in the front row.

I wasn’t exactly popular with the guys during my uber-nerd phase (which lasted from ages 10 to, uh...fortysomething), and playing the tuba didn’t really boost my overall coolness factor.

But there is one shining holiday tradition that makes it all worthwhile: Tubachristmas.

Imagine a performance hall, a church, a school – the middle of a mall – with a hundred or more tuba and baritone players all congregated to play holiday carols. Let me be clear – nothing but tubas and baritones. No other instruments.

Just low brass.

It’s a sound that you can’t describe with words, and as a writer, it pains me to say that. Better than being in the audience, though, is the experience of being on stage with this amazingly deep (pun intended) community. Some members go all out, decorating instruments with Christmas lights, powered by battery packs they tuck into their shirts. A few players dress as Santa in rented red suits. Most of us wear red and green, carry worn music books, and look forward to the fun of sonic booms with a touch of ho-ho-ho as we perform for the crowds.

The crowning jewel of the day is the song “Jingle Bells.” Audience members are invited to pull their key rings out and jingle all the way with us, adding an “instrument” and a new sound to the festivities.

Best of all: Tubachristmas is free to the public. You can go into any search engine, type the term Tubachristmas, and find one in your state (and in a few countries outside the U.S.) or visit

http://www.tubachristmas.com

for more details and to find a performance near you. The U.S., Canada, Switzerland, Costa Rica, and Singapore have Tubachristmas – it’s now an international phenomena.

People love their oompa-pa!

So here’s the problem: for years, I didn’t own a tuba. My kids weren’t interested in going to Tubachristmas. A few years ago, I fixed the tuba ownership issue with a Black Friday deal that was smoking hot. Yes, tubas go on sale for Black Friday! Who knew?

But the biggest obstacle: my youngest son, now seven, hates when I play the tuba. We’re working on it.

My embouchure (lip position when playing the instrument) is sorely out of shape – hey, the lip is a muscle – and “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” starts out as a halting tune better suited to a dying moose’s call than a holiday melody.

And yet I persevere.

Until recently, I hadn't written a romance novel with a tuba-playing heroine, but I am now. It has the working title It’s All About the Tongue.

You can bet Tubachristmas will play a major role in the book.

As holiday traditions go, this one is decidedly weird. Being quirky comes with the territory when you’re a tubachick. Especially a tubachick with Christmas lights on your bell. ;)

Here's hoping you find love in three-part harmony.

<3 Julia

p.s. If enough people comment, I’ll dig up pictures of me playing tuba, and maaaaaybe record myself playing and upload the audio LOL.

Libraries Are the Best

I am the daughter and the granddaughter of librarians, and I worked in a public library, a college library, and in archives as an academic. To say that I love libraries is an understatement.

I love how they feel when you walk in, as if all the ideas are waiting patiently, smiling at you, inviting you in for a chat.

I love how libraries smell, like coming home, like curling up with a book before a fire, like freshly-brewed tea or coffee.

Like hugging a friend.

I love libraries so much, I worked very hard early in my writing career to get my books (and now, audiobooks) into libraries, even against obstacles in the publishing world. So if you're a library user, you're in luck, because I'm going to tell you how you can find my books in your local system. <3

To make my audiobooks accessible to more listeners, I distribute them through lending programs like Hoopla (available in libraries in the US and Canada), and libraries can buy my books through a system called Overdrive, with library patrons using the Libby app to read and listen.

Let me explain how this works: Hoopla is a media streaming platform that allows library patrons to borrow audiobooks, ebooks, movies and other forms of digital content on demand. No waiting, no holds - it's like Netflix. Press the button and start reading or listening instantly.

Library card holders from participating libraries (1700+ across the US and Canada, so check your library) get a specific number of borrows per month (typically between 4 and 12).

You can get started with my audiobooks with Shopping for a Billionaire 1 Or read most of my books in eBook format starting here: Julia Kent on Hoopla

Overdrive is different. Library patrons can request that your local library, or regional library, buy my books so you can borrow them. Unlike Hoopla, you can't just pick up whatever you want, when you want. But your librarian can ;).

Look on the Libby app to see if your library system already has any of my books.

If there are specific books of mine you don't see in libraries, reply back and let me know where your library is located, and which book. I'll do my best to get it in there.

A Bunch of People Picked My Brain and Maybe Regret It

In the "before times" before COVID-19, I actually attended live events and went places (and will again... someday). Podcasts - filmed or recorded in person, or online from home - are a ton of fun for me, and in the book industry I think they give readers a glimpse of how things work behind the scenes.

I know I love to get the scoop on how authors *I* read, like Diana Gabaldon, think and work. Not comparing myself to "Herself," of course, but I've had the wonderful, joyful experience of being interviewed, on panels, and part of conversations that you can listen to or watch for entertainment.

The first was filmed as part of the Cary Library (Arlington, MA) book series. Penny Reid and I were interviewed by librarian Meena Jain, and it was so much fun! Check it out here:

The second was a podcast I recorded onsite at Kobo's headquarters in Toronto, back in 2018. Imagine a small sitting area with 30 or so employees, all hanging out while I spoke with then-head of Kobo Writing Life, Chrissy Munroe. So much fun! Kobo Podcast

Amazon’s KDP University sat down with me in summer 2022 for a very cool talk:

Meena Jain, now at the Ashland Public Library in Ashland, MA, invited me to join her, along with audiobook narrator Andi Arndt, to talk about audiobook creation:

The next are authors who have podcasts:

There are more, but these will get you started. I'm always looking for great podcasts to listen to, so if you know of any, or YouTube channels you follow (I'm a HUGE fan of Andrew Huberman's YouTube videos), let me know about them.